It is easy to see a shortcoming in someone else. Difficult to see our own shortcomings. Even harder to see past the shortcomings on either side and see the real person. Jesus encourages us to “get the plank out of our own eye before we look at the speck of dust” in the eye of the other person.

Each of us has layered over our authentic self; often as a protection against the fears and hurts we sustained as a child or a young teenager. Living life and experiencing therapy can be a catalyst for removing those layers; thus giving us a glimpse of our authentic self.

Having the Empty Chair conversation with a significant other person enables us to loosen and, by choice, remove layers. It will likely  give insight into the person whose behavior has baffled us, angered us and hurt us. As we see through through those surface behaviors both of ourselves and the other person we can begin the process of forgiving ourselves and maybe the significant other person.